The Real Thing About Realities

Two people enquired about a soccer friend of mine today. The reaction that I gave, was in my opinion, unbecoming for a married 28 year old like me. I gave the nonchalant, oblivious and I don’t give a darn kinda answer as to his whereabouts. As I sat down, pondering on why I have this acute sense of disgust for his disappearance, I then realised the root of my distress. I believe I care enough to realize and sense when someone is wasting something away.

It’s All In The Noose

It turned out to be an amusing morning. I woke up, read the news, watched the news and pondered about news. It’s been one heck of a week I think. But firstly, my heart goes out to the Samoans, who had just been hit by an 8.0 magnitude earthquake. For a coastal area, such a catastrophe should have been catalysmic. Days ago, Manila was hit by severe floods and Indonesia was also hit by a natural disaster. Brings a sense of foreboding worry. For me, personally at least.

Whines Of a Whimsical Whiner

*Disclaimer

I blame no one for the entry below, for my neurotic rants.I am responsible for every course of actions I undertake.And yes,I don’t really care if you have an opinion about this entry.I am just entitled to mine.*winks*

 

I’ve not been to office for the past one week.I lazed around the confinement of my room trying to gather a semblance of organized thoughts.I was restless.Restless with my conflicts.So I made myself useful,by being a daddy,playing with my kid.I surfed non stop.Explored blogs,websites and anything I can get my hands on,or rather what my mouse could scroll over.My restlessness stemmed from that stupid question I asked myself earlier in the month of August which was,”Why am I chasing after people who do not care about their money?”Truth was,this whole planning for people processes are getting to me.I no longer gain the satisfaction of investing/wasting my time,on peepz who will probably lapse their policies in 6 months.Screw what my manager has to say about residual/passive income.I no longer seem to care,seriously.

Sick Of Wealth

I’m not rich.Definitely far off from being wealthy.I am wearing a watch that costs me $12.My wallet costs me $8.My mobile phone was given to me by my sister.I sleep on a bed that costs $150,with a mattress that costs slightly less than $50,perhaps.My side table lamp costs,$18,bought from Mustafa Center.My most expensive shirt costs $23.My most expensive pants costs $80,bought 8 years ago by my ex girlfriend.I carry two $1.85 pens for my appointments.My most expensive folder costs $35,bought 6 years ago.My most expensive jeans costs $30,after conversion,after having bought it at Bangkok 4 years ago.My most expensive business shoes costs $29.90.My most expensive casual shoes,cost $20 after having bought it at City Square Johor Bahru.And yes,I’ve yet to buy a soccer boot that costs more than a $100 bucks.

Why am I recalling all this senseless facts?

The Biggest Balls Definitely’s Not Yours

I will like to think that I am beyond criticizing these days.The old adage that if you cannot beat them,you avoid them sounds or at least rings a tune to me.I have to mention this snippet of an incident to highlight why sometimes I find that some guys just have their balls in the wrong location.

About 5 days ago,I had received a text message from a close friend of mine.Around 2 am.A female.Oh okie,it’s actually a cherished former soulmate.She texted,asking how I was and how the baby was.Since it was kinda late,I ignored the messaged and decided to text her  a reply at a later opportunity.That later opportunity was yesterday evening,as I was on my way home.The typical bored me,texted her a message replying that everything was good,and the baby was good and kindly asked how she was faring herself.I did not get an immediate reply though.So,when Igot home,I received a call from an unknown mobile number.The bane of my career these days,is that I will pick up any unknown calls,cause you never know who will be at the end of the line.Anyway I picked it up and a man’s voice was heard,

7.5 Reasons Why Being A Dad Is Great.

I’m a newly minted Dad.Well,not exactly new.I’m into my 5th semester.But I’ve realized certain points,I reckon can be taken by some,as a reason good enough to appreciate that new Life.

Reason 1 : Having people remark how your child looks like you.

This is a reason that my other half absolutely hates.But I always soothe her by saying that perhaps,the remark was just a casual and general observation.I always highlight that looks and physical appearances are temporary,and therefore does not mean much.Instead it’s things like her intelligence,wisdom,personality and so forth are the ones the child probably inherited.In all fairness,my son can have all the intrisic things that his mother have,but having people say that his eyes,smile and cuteness is like me,just makes my pants drop a bit.Besides,my child should look like me.Who else should he look like right?

Fixing A Broken Heart that’s filled with stories

How do you describe a song that is so ingrained in that corner of your alpha and omega state of consciousness as that song that seemed to define a certain period,event or just person?

The Big Give

It’s been a blessed week of Ramadhan.Well,not in that spiritual sense of things.It just has been a wonderful few days.

Yesterday,13th September,I had one of my enjoyable days ever.Had the company of my wife,Kai and his accompanying partner Niza.The fact that we were out to have a mini celebration sorta for my bro’s birthday,was just cool.He inititiated the idea anyway,but I was just appreciative of the whole idea of a dinner.Heh.

We started the outing at 4 with a trip to the Science Center.God knows just how long it has been since I last stepped on the concretes of that building.As what my bro wrote on his blog entry,we(the 4)just literally turned into Smurf like characters trying all the exhibits displayed there.There was this particular exhibit that intrigued me,that of an electric chair.I asked Kai to try it after me.What we did was to insert a dollar coin,sit ourselves on the chair and hold two protruding metallic handle.The handles basically reverberated with pulses of high intensity,that mimicked the flow of electric,through the body.There were two modes.High and low voltages.Being the men we were,of course we started with the high.And the experience had indeed left us with a few charged sperms in our scrotums.Hahahaha.

We tried other stuffs.Took pictures alongside the F1 cars.Spoke through pipes.Dragged magnetic bars.Crawled through exhibits.Put our hands through a whirling tornado.Spoke to a Apatosaurus.(A Malay breed of Dinosaurs)Watched hatched chicks.And proceeded to leave at 6.Science Center closes at 6.

Then off Kai drove,to the lushes greeneries that of Clementi Woods,as the Sakura International eatery beckoned.It was just the perfect setting Kai needed.Heh.Excellent,affordable and widespread set of buffet dishes,complete with the romantic ambience that called out for love and serenity.It was just pure delight,as we engaged our tastebuds to the various spread available.Things took a cuter turn when we were out brandishing our secondary school pictures,with the exception of my wife.It was an ego bashing trip as Kai,myself and Niza tried to establish the numero uno geek that was us.Niza had that geeky,Ugly Betty setting,though she grew out of that to become an amiable lady now.Hahaha.Kai?Need I say more?I had in my collections,some pictures that will surely feature in his autobiography,in that chapter called,”Looks I Will Rather Forget”.Wahahahaha.

After the dinner,yours truly suggested watching a movie over at Cineleisure.Wanted to catch the horror flick 4bia,but due to the unavailable seatings.we settled for stepbrothers.the movie was just a brainless delight.loved it to bits.

Me & My Ride & My Wife

It’s been a good Saturday.Niza was just a delight.She was a highlight with her oblivioous,nonchalant and spaced out demeanour.Hahahaha.She is so much an enjoyable addition to the circle of friends my wife and myself have.Kai had a very good 27 year old birthday celebration.

Well…to summarise.I had immense fun.And I am looking forward to such outings in the future.

*at this point,Jaz holds up his hands in supplication that may the power that be,Allah,grant my bro a semblance of hope of a dynamic and encouraging transition into something worth cherishing in that realm of associations.Waahahahahaha.(I just can be so non commital).

Happy Birthday Kai…you are a year older,3 years to that big 30.Weeeeeeee.We all grow old huh?Hahahahaha.

Crisis Of The Credit Crunch

So it’s  kinda official.The financial market is truly downsizing and on the brink of crashing.So what’s new?The telltale signs were evident throughout the whole of last year.As I had highlighted in my workshops over the past few months,and as written by Robert Kiyosaki,it was just something awaiting.I had once highlighted about the usefulness of watching the YOUTUBE video entitled Zeitgeist.In it,it briefly describes and gives you an idea on how the banking system in US and the rest of the world works.It’s useful because it gives you that needed knowledge on how money is created and distributed to the market.

The thing about the mortgage crisis is primarily the issue of bad debts.If you are to imagine this scenario.Take it that Bank A,one day decides to issue out loans to people who wants to buy homes.Now,Bank A has decided to take on the policy of not caring whether the borrower has good or bad credit.What it means is that,Bank A do not really care or know of your financial capability to pay off the debts/loans.Now supposedly,this policy is being followed through with the hundred thousands of citizens applying for mortgage loans.What you’ll have over time is Bank A issuing out loans with the non guarantee its borrowers can pay back.Now,imagine if Bank A had actually issued out loans beyond  its liquidity capabilities?It’s just like me having only 100 bucks in my bank,but I issue out loans say in the amount of $1000.I am banking on my borrowers to pay their debt/loan plus the interests incurred.But that is based on my good faith.What if these borrowers just decided that they cannot pay out of non afford ability?Who will be left with the bulk of the problem?Me,of course.In the financial world,it’s the banks of course.The thing about loans these days,is that it is a contract.Nothing more.When you borrow a loan,what you get is a paper assurance that your financial liability ie mortgage can be paid over a period of years with interests.That is why credit rating should have been implemented more strictly in US.Maybe it was the cockiness of the bankers and institutions there,about the over hyped market outlook.They disregarded the golden rule of never committing what you cannot afford.In their case,taking on loans beyond their capabilities.

Whilst some people may choose to line up outside AIA building this morning,to liquidate their investments,others like myself may take a rather pragmatic approach.I’ve always highlighted that market is all about emotions and sentiments.This morning,as I saw the news,I finally appreciate the whole significance of market fear playing on the minds of investors.All it took was just a reported news of a bank going bust,and off they swarmed to liquidate their assets.There is nothing wrong about it.It’s just that if we were to take a long walk down the lanes of history,we would have realized that the same scenario played itself over centuries.Great Depression was such an example.1997 financial crisis was another.They were many.So what it indicates,is that,it had happened,it’s now happening,and it will happen again.There is a cycle transcending all these.If people observed.

So what do smart financial people do?They capitalize on the fears to start investing and buying into good funds that had taken a dip in its offered prices.When the majority of the herd panicked,they remain composed and steadfast in their long term planning.Buy cheap and wait.For the next cycle.Strangely,such knowledge is not taken in by the masses even with the influx of massive financial knowledge available these days.Another strange thing.Whilst our community busy itself with spending in the merriments of Geylang,it’s my Chinese associates that had been calling and asking for my views and takes on the current scenario.In fact,whilst I was at the Success shop over at Peninsula,I had an engaging chat with a few of the browsing customers and the boss of the shop.What a contrast in response from two sets of community.I just hope that our community know what is happening in the world these days.

My pal Rezdwan had just launched his site,RezdwanHamid.I was privileged and honored to have been given the opportunity to sign up for his weekly ezines.The thing that made me happy and proud to be within his circles of associates is the fact that,he is a testimony of a humble spirit of enterprise.Someone who tries to pursue his area of interests,and at the same time,on his way to achieving his financial dreams.His level of expertise is his knowledge on websites buildings.It is in his plan to make it a profitable venture with time.What sets him apart from the many Malay guys/girls out there,is that you can sense his passion and enthusiasm from the way he writes.I loved the way he writes.And coming from me,you know,I mean it.In fact I implore and suggest that you guys sign up with his ezines and read up on the wealth of info he’s sharing.And yes,I am not getting any commission cuts from him.Because,his infos are all free!!!No kidding!So before this guy makes it big time,you better jump on his band wagon and learn a thing or two.I am learning from him,that’s for sure.

Tip of the day from me…

“Despite the market situation,don’t panic!Remember what happened to those who panicked in the sinking of the Titanic?They drowned.You have a plan!So stick to the plan!”

Being In The Red

My Redbacks team has been discussing fervently on the feasibility of joining a social league.As I gave my inputs,and then reflecting on the various responses,I just had to sigh with a sense of resignation.I forgot that I’m playing with a Malay outfit,that has the inclination that enjoyment is just a byproduct of passion.I had raised the issues of financial appeal being a crucial element in joining the league.I mean,a game in a social league,entails $100.Spread that over say,approximately 5 months/20 weeks max,it totals to around $2000.The unique thing about Redbacks is the policy of subsidizing fee amounts for those players bracketed in the category of non salaried.Meaning that they are either students,or in betweens,like my bro Aki.Maybe it’s just me.But I’ve been trying to rationalize why players need to be subsidize?If we were to go on trips,such as the one in Mersing,where players can afford $50 for a one off trip,is that not amounting to $10,spread over 5 weeks?Hmmmm.Just my financial planning getting the better of me.Wahahaha.

Setting Sail By Anchoring

I am in the midst of completing a book on salesmanship,which I bought earlier in the week.There was this particular chapter called “Anchoring”.Students of psychology and neuro linguistic programming will identify with me on this.What was interesting about this topic and my relation with this entry is this simple notion.

“Where you anchored,will determine where you sail…”-My quotes of brilliance.

Reading Kai’s recent entry,affirms my suspicion.Well,yes,I relate to what he wrote because it reflected aptly also what I felt initially.That fear.That sense of helplessness of perhaps not being in control of the impending situation.This in an effort to control the locus of influence,we,our neuro programming,anchored itself on the last recorded memory of the circumstance.Well,of course in both our cases,the plight of being sidelined.Hahahah.But still,this is just an extended personal reflection.I still believe that my logical reasoning of the team’s structural inability applies,no matter.

Why anchoring?Simple.

2B Or Not2B

A funny thought came to mind.What if I can classify generically,people into categories.

• Will Be
• Cannot Be
• May Be

Music Of My Life

tell me how I’m supposed to breathe with no air? – usher and jordin sparks

somehow,and i don’t know how…music is just my air.the very elemental essence in which i draw inspiration from.the earlier entries about anchors just reminded me about yet another anchor.an anchor that is often overlooked but we fail to recognize its value.its intrinsic value that is.music.

What Do You Want?

The family just bought itself a 32 inch flat screened television set.Nothing fancy.Just an unknown brand,called Sirius,from a local company.I saw it on sale for 100 pieces at AMK Hub and promptly relayed the info to my sis,who headed down the next day with the family to purchase it.Just prior to that,we had done a bit of survey at Mustafa Center to get a ‘feel’ of what will make a great addition to the furniture.

Before anyone jump on that conclusion that,it’s just another atypical Malayish,Hari Raya purchase,it will be worthy to highlight that my sis bought it,with the rest chipping in a bit,with the money she earned over the past month selling potato chips.Hahaha.I have to say that I admire the tenacity at which she worked the hours to gather that sum of money,and I felt that it was just due reward on her part,to purchase a big ticket item.Do we need the television set?Obviously not.We have one 24 inch working one.But do we want a flat screened one?Yes,we did.

Yes,I’m Gay

Only a man on the brink of fading stardom will take the creative initiative of claiming to the world,and admitting amidst the rumors,that,”Yes Mom!I’m Gay!”Clay Aiken disappoints me.Not because he is gay.But because he is a selfish gay who apparently has no idea what that statement had just entailed.Well,just months back,he claimed fatherhood to a born child,with his girlfriend.Months later,now,he claims he is gay.What he is doing is actually guaranteeing that his child will grow up one day,surfs the internet on celebrities’ wild admissions,and find his dad’s name,with a picture of him being cuddled when he was an infant,with the bold headlines,”Yes.I’m gay!”Well,Clay…who cares.The fact is,we know you are ever since you greeted our homes on American Idol. We knew you had that atypical look and persona to live out that genre of sexuality.In fact we are gay about you being gay.Just spare your child the blushes and the therapy sessions he has to endure later.

Romeo,Wherefore Art Thou?

An Angel Awaiting

Oh well.This is an entry long awaiting. Was surfing You Tube. Saw this one hell of a video I used to bawl my eyes out for. It was Des’ree’s song,”Kissing You” off the soundtrack of Romeo and Juliet.I love the movie.Watched it like 7 times on screen.3 times by myself.I still curse the day when my Literature teacher announced that the literary text for my O levels was Macbeth. Who the hell reads Macbeth? I am still so sure till this very day that if the literary text that time was Romeo and Juliet.I would have top the subject,nationwide.

The universal quotient,that is love,never fails to intrigue me.As I get older,as I mature,I will like to believe that I’ve understood the various facets of love.What creates it?What defines it?What destroys it?What nurtures it?But guess what?The answer eludes me.I’ll be chastised for saying this,but all that I,personally am sure at,is that the answer to a future lies in the lessons of the past.It’s a whole shenanigan of bull I know,but what I am trying to conclude from my statement is that,to improve the quality of our future love live/relationships,it is vital for one to understand where he or she stands before this,on the ideals of love.

Romeo and Juliet defines a fantasy love setting for me.I loved the whole notion that a love so strong still cannot bind you to a life of being together.Well,of course in today’s context,Romeo and Juliet’s escapades in wanting to meet each other may seem foolish.(Because we have that thing call view cams on our desktops).But back then,this was the penultimate idea of love.Struggle and sacrifices.But this rather primitive and primal context of having to struggle and sacrifice,should still apply…I personally believe.

These days I believe,it is so easy to give up.It is easier to pat oneself on the back and say that there are a whole host of options awaiting out there.A bit of complication and rejection these days,will pave the way for the nearest exit door.So what you have,is the proverbial setting of a whole list long of dates,girlfriends,boyfriends and whatever there is that makes a social community.I know cause I’ve been through it.It’s been so long now since I heard,from anyone,in my circle of contacts,hanging on a waiting love.Hahaha.A story where the guy probably has to wait ages for the love of that special woman.

Syawal…wal…wal…walauweh!

Selamat Hari Raya

In slightly less than two months,Americans will be heading down their way to polling booths to place their votes for their next American president.Will it be the charismatic Obama with his aide Biden?Or will it be McCain and his bumbling aide,Palin?No matter what the outcome of the polls will be,one thing is for sure,you and I will be part of it.

This economic crisis that is seemingly besieging the world.It seems to cloud an issue.A misty haze seems to settle on our awareness,on something rather important.As throngs of my community go about their never ending visitations in this month of Syawal,I just wonder…”Are they aware?”

As the MRT train pulls into stations,my eyes never fail to catch the fleeting smiles of families decked in the vibrant colors of their kurungs.It’s joyous.It’s pretty.It’s surreal.And when I blink my eyes again to capture that picturesque moment,I see children running around,tears and blood streaming down their cheeks,escaping the bomb shells scattering in the vicinity,scrambling for the safety of sheltering rubbles.I blink my eyes again,and my consciousness was brought back to sunny Singapore,from the war torn lands of Palestine.

Rock My Way

Seriously,who bothers if you had a fairly good week.I do.Especially if it’s my week.The surest conclusion I’ve derived from the whole of last week is this.If football is back in my life,everything else will fall into place.They say,normality creeps in.My whole of last week had the word “footie” plastered all over.

Consider this:

1.I bought a pair of NIKE Tiempos,(eventhough I have a pair of Adidas Telstar sitting at home.)My rationale for getting a new pair is simple.I needed it.(aka,I wanted it).The sickening thing is that I realize now that I could have gotten it at at even better bargain over at Peninsula Plaza.Well,I’m not crying over it.I’m getting NIKE Super Ligeira next month.At $110 per pair,it’s the bargain of the century.

2.Received a call from a team asking for my availability to play with the team in the ESPZEN league.Fact is I don’t even care about the call.I was just pleasantly surprised that I received the call.Because my theory was proven right.I had placed my “credentials” on the site,in that faint hope that someone might take notice.Well,someone did,apparently.Goes to show that humanistic nature of people believing in that thing called,reputation.Heck,they do not know I’ve got a creaked right knee.

3.Resumed my weekly kickabout with Stamford over at Marina.What a joy to be just caressing the ball with old mates,and then capping off the night with a cup of hot tea.Shiok to the max.Best things in life come in small packages.The kickabout helped in preparing me for the then,upcoming Sunday game.

4.Climaxing the week,with a well deserving win,with my Redbacks team.The joy was intensified with the small fact that yours truly,opened his scoring account.The small pleasant surprise was on being given the role of an attacking midfielder in a 5 midfield outfit lineup.It feels good to have come out of the game unscathed.In a team abundant with a flourish of attacking minded players,it did not really mattered actually,how the midfielders lined up.In my perspective,each and every of the players on that Sunday,had the fluidity in movement.New inclusions in the team were a welcoming add ons.They gave a different dimension to the array of options.I was just pleased and happy that people like Nordin has made a committed comeback.It’s things like these that makes sessions appealing.I believe a comment made by Ayyub when his brother opened his scoring account,summed up the evening.”Another 29 to go!”in reference to his brother’s goals of 30 goals this season.It highlighted  a sense of optimism and goodwill.

Fear Of A Samurai

“The realization of certain death should be renewed every morning.Each morning,you must prepare yourself for every kind of death with composure of mind.Imagine yourself broken by bows,guns,spears,swords,carried off by floods,leaping into huge fire,struck by lightning,torn apart by earthquake,plunging from a cliff,as a disease ridden corpse.”

- Tsunetomo Yamamoto ,”Hagakure”

Morbid?Certainly not.I was reading up on my usual stuffs on salesmanship and came across this very interesting chapter that brought out a renewed vigor.”Samurai Selling” was the chapter.The chapter started interestingly with that short anecdote of that irrationality called fear,gripping the minds of salesman like me.Fear that immobilizes us into that frame of uselessness and hopelessness.

Hari Raya Leftovers

Well not exactly leftovers.Pictures that I took during this festive season which never seems to end.Just thought it will be a good addition in this year’s entry.Heh.

Playing The Devil’s Advocate

Extended brothers

Who’s that good looking guy in black?

Spot the Guy

Who’s the cutest?

Families

I Killed Ultraman

I had an eventful day.I could have chosen to type my thoughts out about how a Malay taxi driver and myself commented about how mosques nowadays look like churches from the back,and community centers from the side,views.It was a conversation driven out of my conversational context as my taxi made its way into the parking lot of Asyafaah mosque.

Or perhaps,I can type my ramblings,about the current economic situation facing the Malay Muslim community,as discussed between myself and a community serving official.About how Malay Muslims are in general…

1.Love being spoon fed

2.Loathes changes

3.Lacking initiative to be proactive

….

10010.Loser’s Limb Mentality

Or I can type about how a realization on how Mendaki funds may be suggested to perhaps deduct say $3 bucks monthly from a working group of people.There are 600,000 Malay Muslims in Singapore.Let’s pessimistically put it that only 200,000 are active workers.Let’s pessimistically put it that only 100,000 out of this 200,000 contribute monthly to the fund.That’ll be $300,000 a month from collections.Multiply it by 12 months.That’ll be $3.6 million a year.Multiply it by a modest 10 years worth of collection,that’ll be $36 million.Then again it’s just my bias unproven theory that such amount of money even exists.Going by the amount of money we need every year,am sure I’m way off my calculations.Maybe Yayasan Mendaki has lesser funds.

Or I can perhaps write about why I feel uplifted,angry,purposeful,inspired,revengeful and just plain emotional when I am listening in to One Republic’s,”Apologize”,like how I’m doing now.There is something haunting about the song.Something about the song that just throws me back into that wormhole of being an asshole.Something that cries out,”I could and have should done better.”

The Garment of Change

I just finished watching myself on television.It’s hard to believe but all praise to Allah that my wish of being able to be on live tv,with my bro Kai came by eventually.14 years ago,as scrawny teenagers that we were,appearing on television would have been a notion out of a Star Wars theory.But,by the great grace of magical opportunities,a chance came by.I believe that we,made good account of our brief moments of limelight.I was just cracking with laughter noting how Kai’s appearance was littered with scratching of his head,a mixture of Singlish and Malay and his self calling manner of making statements,like for example,”Khairil believe investments are good now…blah…Khairil feel…blah”.And how his certificates and family pictures got involved in the context of investments,beats the hell out of me.Hahahaha.(Even a fellow Facebooker commented on his certificate)But my thoughts were just on that idea that someway or somehow,a set of parents will be saying out loud to their daughter,

7.5 Love Lessons For My Son

This may be a bit premature but I was just thinking through the realms of my thoughts,should that day of reckoning finally arrives,when my son will be in his teens,grappling with the emotional facets of his unstable heart.He will be faced with unrecognizable fluttering and unfamiliar churning in his system.He might be looking for some sort of guide.Answers to his questions.Questions that I myself had to answer,on my own without the help of a fatherly figure.Obviously I had to rough it out in the wilderness of that thing called experience.All for that elusive search for that one thing called “true love”.Well,by now it’s pretty obvious that the whole notion is blasphemous.In my perspective at least.

But here I am,trying to assemble a piece of simple guide for my son.What to look out for,and what to avoid.What to remember and what to forget.(Hah!)

Walking along Clarke Quay

I had a Toastmasters meeting last night,in which I left early since the intended speaker I was to evaluate made a last minute disappearing act.Hate such moments but it’s those kind of unavoidable moments in life where things are just unexpected.Anyway,since the meeting was at Clarke Quay and the watched showed that I still had ample time,I decided to have my dinner.As I walked through the alleys of pubs and bars,a million images flooded the membranes of my memories.It’s been a while since I last stepped along the turf.

I decided to have my customary fried Maggie at a familiar Indian food outlet.My eyes were greeted by 4 attractive looking Malay ladies,having their dinner.With skirts and hot pants lining the curves on their bodies,it was not that hard to guess their agenda for the night.For a blue Monday,I was a bit surprised that people could have the motivation to enjoy a night out.But one man’s meat is another man’s poison.And so they say.Heck,for all I know they may just be working in one of those pubs.They noticed my greeting eyes and they responded with that piercing stare of,”What are you looking at?Do we look like sluts to you?”kinda look.At which point,I just looked away in embarrassment.Not because I was,but the corner of my eyes caught an auntie’s underwear peeking out from the hot pants of one of the ladies.I was blushing in embarrassment for her.Nude in color.

A Simple Man

Sunday was a great day.Only because I scored a stupendous goal.A goal that had the imaginative exploits of a trying footballer.To score a scissors kicked goal off a great play was gratifying.Praises to my Lord.I hand it solely down to Him.I’ve solved that conclusive mystery of an inspired based performance.Fact is,prior to that,I had performed my Asar prayers just before heading off to the filed at the Jamiyah Center at Geylang with Kai.This may sound ridiculous,but I had specifically supplicated that may I have His blessings to put in a good performance.After the last sujud,my eyes were just illuminated with clarity.Nothing divine behind that actually,as we all know that when you sujud,that posture allows blood through.Thus,the clarity in the eyes.And I believe I was playing that time whilst I was still in ablution state.It was just a magical and inspired evening of soccer for me.As I had mentioned to Kai and the guys,that when the ball was floated into the penalty area,everything around me just went into the background,and the ball suddenly appeared to be larger.Its movement towards me seemed to be slow in motion.It was just surreal.Everything after that was just a blank.All I remembered was me running back to the half line.Definitely my best orgasmic moment.

Play It!

Finally a real phone.

I finally got my hands on a new phone after a tormenting period of using my China manufactured phone for over 4 months.First mistake I made was to sell my Nokia 6300.Second mistake was to think that I need a PDA kinda phone.Third mistake was to imagine how using a stylus or touch screen will help.Last mistake was to get that wretched,non signal receiving phone.I hereby swear off any China version of anything and everything.And that includes XBOX or PS3 if they ever manage to clone one.And touch screen is a unique feature that I am not keen to explore.IPhone no longer appeals to me.I’ve had enough of touching anything.

I’ve still yet to catch SAW 5.Urrrrrrrrgh!

Downloaded a beautiful song awhile ago.Titled “Last Flight Out” by that now defunct gospel boy band,Plus One.Still recall how I used to blast that song every single morning and night in my bunk whilst serving my recruit days.My bunk mates had to hide the radio,before I continued bursting their ear drums.I was in love back then and the song kinda heightened the plethora of unbridled emotions.

I’ll be presenting a 20 minutes presentation to the National Football team over at Amara Hotel next Monday,and I’ve yet to prepare the slides.I just realized and formulated a program in which wealth management is very much like soccer management.The clients are the managers and financial planners like myself are the second hand man/head coaches like Carlos Queiroz.And your financial products are very much like your players.Let me illustrate,

Goalkeeper : Term Insurance

Central Defender ( 1 ) : Critical Illness Insurance

Central Defender ( 2 ) : Total & Permanent Disability Insurance

Left Defender : Hospital & Medical Insurance

Right Defender : Personal Accident Insurance

Central Midfielder ( 1 ) : Short / Long Term Endowment

Central Midfielder ( 2 ) : Whole Life

Left Midfielder : Regular Investment Linked Product

Right Midfielder : Single Investment Linked Product

Striker ( 1 ) : Unit Trusts / Stocks

Striker ( 2 ) : Annuity

Reserves : Home Mortgage , Company Employee Benefits , CPF , Traditional Savings , Others

In essence if I were to be asked what is my financial tactics,I’ll say that it is a 4-4-2.Like players,every product has its worth and prices.My job as a wealth consultant is to advise you on the players performances and benefits it may bring to your financial tactics.Ultimately,as the manager you still have to decide how much to allocate for that player/product.If your financial life is a game,what is your tactic?That’s my question.Selection of the needed player/product is crucial,and will also influence if you can play your financial game well enough to win it finally.Now I need a name for this wealth program.Anyone?

The Blessed Land

Kaabah

My beloved sis and brother in law had left just a week ago,for the Holy Land of Mecca to perform their Hajj.I envied their departure.To be the invited guests of Allah,over in His Holy Land,is such a blessing.It may seem weird that my sis and my bro in law who are both not working,are able to perform this obligation,without any hassle and complications.Although one may argue that they are able to go,with the proceeds from the sale of their house,I still adhere to that perspective that if Allah wills it,it will happen.I mean $30K for the both of them to depart,is no small amount.And my bro in law and sis sold the house a year ago.There are some people who sell their houses and get more money and yet can spend all of it within months.I noted with awe just how a blessed wealth can be stretched.It defies simple financial logic at times.Still remember the comments made by a participating workshop member after my session.In my session,I had mentioned about the blessings of wealth.How a low income earner can have his needs met without being deprived whilst the man with the extravagant pay check can barely survive after 2 weeks.This lady came up to me and thanked me for reminding her.She was just a helper at the mosque with a monthly income of $600.Yet she’s taking care of a household filled with an old aged mother,a cancer stricken husband and two kids schooled in madrasahs.And she’s not in dire needs of poverty.I was humbled to listen in to her sharing.I used to think that behind every story in life,there are numbers.Ever since I tried to gather resources for my programs and advises,I have learned so much.Instead of the former principle,I now think of what is the story behind the number.A millionaire could have gotten his wealth through robbery.The story behind his millions is therefore not worth mentioning.The man who drove a taxi sending his kids through university studies.The story behind his financial ability is worth emulating.That is why I get uncomfortable sometimes when peers or family members make remarks such as,”It’s okay with Jaz.He’s earning tonnes of money.”or “Jaz is rich.He can afford it.”Truth is,I’m uncomfortable because it makes the focal of my standing and reputation on my earning ability.Which is something I do not really desire.There are times when my earnings can be zilch for the month.There are times when my earnings are beyond my expectations.But I make it a point to not whine when it’s zilch.And when I make more,I make it a point to treat my family members or my clients.If one studies the mechanics of wealth building,one knows just how transient the numbers can be.I’ve earned in a year what people earn in three,but not a single cent is left of that money.Because how I derived that wealth and how I spent it were not blessed.I was ignorant.So,now am learning the ropes all again in the schematics of earning blessed wealth.The pursue of wealth is not my primary objective and I try as much to inculcate that value in my clients and family members.Because I’ve seen and experienced,how a little sum of money,coupled with the help of God can go a long way out.Even till now,I will never forget that experience of giving alms after my Friday prayers at Darul Ghufran mosque to a lady.I think the sum was $5.When I got back to office,I received a call from someone referred to me.He did business with me,and my commission from that transaction was in excess of $1K.Allah’s promise was true.Lend Him with your wealth and he will return it in folds.I still get goosebumps relating that story.

In relating my sis’s departure,I feel an acute sense of longing to visit Mecca again.In the very near future.May I be invited again,this time with my wife and child.For those who may not have got the opportunity to visit the Holy Land,do include your desire of doing so in your supplications.If they say Disneyland is a magical world,they obviously have not visited Mecca or Medina.

Quarantined In The Weekend Room

I’ve been guilty of not updating my blog.Heh.Then again,sometimes I truly wonder who reads my blogs or entries.I know I’ve got tonnes of traffic from Kai’s site,Redbacks’s site and to an extent my pal Sri’s site.Apart from all that,I wonder if I’m reaching out to a multitude of readers out there.Perhaps Sean Paul,P.Diddy and Jay-Z have been reading my entries to gain some inspiration.Wahahahaah.Or maybe,there are ex girlfriends out there who are reading my entries to detect any semblances of chaos and disorder in my life,so that they may slap themselves on the butt and exclaim,”See what happens to Jaz since I left him.”I know,sometimes the best way to feel good about yourself is by reveling in people’s miseries.It’s normal and I understand.In fact I always look through the obituaries to see if some enemies had passed on.Unfortunately,I do not have enemies worthy of my attention.

Random Nights Of The Unearthly Type

When do you know that you are having one of those random nights when anything can just happen?It’s when in the middle of the night at around 11 pm whilst you are watching America’s Next Top Model with your spouse,and your mum knocks on the door asking for your assistance.What assistance you ask?A neighbor who lives on the upper floor had just called your mum,saying that her daughter is spooked.So off you go,cleaning yourself up,taking ablution,grabbing hold off your mobile phone and your trusty Holy Quran.As the elevator makes its way up,images of turning heads,screams and twisting torsos fill up your highly charged imagination.As you make your way,you realize that the home was already filled with people judging by the number of footwear outside the door.As you venture inside the home,you noticed a familiar girl sprawled up on her kitchen dining chair.Eyes closed shut whilst saying,”Get her away!I do not want to see her!Get her away!”Nearby,a man clad in “songkok” went into the room and began calling out the prayers of “adzan” loudly.You just stand there clearly at loss as to how you should make your presence count.You tried to eavesdrop on the conversations,to understand the origins of the situation.In between chatters,you hear that the girl who was on her way home with her mum,(your neighbour),saw a white fleeting anomaly whilst in the cab along Upper Thomson.Curiously,she chose to exclaim the observation out loud to the irritation of her mum who obviously knew better.Too late.The anomaly apparently decided to tag along and pay a visit to her home as it made its horrific appearance to her,frightening her to pieces.And thus,here you are…

Best Reminder of the Day

Did my usual surfing and came upon this gem.Succinct yet full of wisdom.Masha Allah.

Just sharing with you.For if you practice even just one of these,Insya Allah I will reap the rewards of your good deeds,for it is good knowledge shared.

Taken from : http://alirfad.wordpress.com

- A traveler once came to the Masjid to see the Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W) after greeting the Prophet, he was asked where he was from. The traveler replied that he came from very far just to get a few questions answered. Following is the dialogue between the traveler and the Prophet.

Traveler         : I do not want azhab (punishments) to be written in my account.

Prophet         : Behave well with your parents

Traveler        : I want to be known amongst people as an intelligent person.

Prophet         : Fear Allah (Jalla Jalal Ho), always.

Traveler        : I want to be counted amongst Allah’s favorites.

Prophet         : Recite Qur’an every morning and evening.

Traveler        : I want my heart to always be enlightened. (Roshan and Munawer)

Prophet         : Never forget death.

Traveler        : I never want to be away from Allah’s blessing.

Prophet         : Always treat fellow creatures well.

Traveler        : I never want to be harmed by my enemies.

Prophet         : Always have faith in only Allah.

Traveler        : I never want to be humiliated.

Prophet         : Be careful of your actions.

Traveler        : I wish to live long.

Prophet         : Always do sile rahm. (Goodness towards blood Relations)

Traveler        : I want my sustenance to increase.

Prophet         : Always be in Wudhoo.

Traveler        : I wish to stay free of azhaab in the grave.

Prophet         : Always wear pure (paak) clothes.

Traveler        : I never want to be burned in hell.

Prophet         : Control your eyes and tongue.

Traveler        : How do I get my sins forgiven?

Prophet         : Always ask forgiveness from Allah with a lot of humility.

Traveler        : I want people to respect me always.

Prophet         : Never extend your hands of need at people.

Traveler        : I want to always be honored.

Prophet         : Never humiliate or put down anyone.

Traveler        : I don’t want to be squeezed by Fishare Qabr. (Squeezing in the grave)

Prophet         : Recite Surat El Mulk (The Dominion) often.

Traveler        : I want my wealth to increase.

Prophet         : Recite Surat El Waqiah (The Inevitable) every night.

Traveler        : I want to be safe and at peace on Day of Judgment.

Prophet         : Do Zikr (Praises) of Allah from dusk to night.

Traveler        : I want to be in full attention and concentration during prayers.

Prophet         : Always do Wudhoo with concentration and attention.

Salam Aidiladha From Me

Salam Aidiladha

Salam Aidiladha

May all our struggles and sacrifices be

rewarded with Allah’s blessings.

Insanity Of A Sanitized Malay

What is insanity?To Einstein,it’s a bout expecting a different result albeit repetitions of the same actions.(something like the state of my current Redbacks team.Heh!)Insanity in recent days to me has been about,Shah Rukh Khan getting a “Dato”ship.Insanity is about people over in our neighboring country trying to put a fixated point of blame,on the landslide that led to the collapse of one of their premier residences.Insanity is about the Thai people still grappling over who should be Prime Minister.A pro Thaksin party or a pro Thaksin party?Insanity is about the New Paper featuring two stories of pathetic Malay Muslim families,burdened with financial struggles.Families that turned down job offers because of unsuitability.Saddled with debts yet having the 40 inch flat screen with sound system as part of household items.Insanity is all about one thing.

Chaos.

The Man Napolean Feared

I do not particularly enjoy the year end period.Especially when I am in a industry that thrives on targets.By which I mean,the goal setting component of my industry.We do that year in year out.As financial planners,we are to put in a projection of our sales target,and are of course required to hit them or surpass them.Fact is,over the past two years,I’ve not been hitting mine.Cause of concerns for some,especially my manager.We had our year end review session yesterday afternoon.Needless to say,it was filled with tonnes of information downloading,on statistical evidence of people hitting their targets.In the common eyes of the industry,such people are successful.As I sat down there,I asked myself,”Why am I not affected by such displays of success?Why am I feeling empty with the glorification of successful people that are translated by the numerical superiority of their bank statements?Why?Why?Why?”

It’s so unfortunate that I am thinking.

Right after that session,my manager brought me into his room,and we had a mini coaching session.He asked reflectively on the 2009 goals and targets booklet I had submitted to him.First question he asked,

“Was the $8000 you had projected in your income statement for the year 2009,from your wife’s income?”

I gulped down my answer.Shocked and stunned by the question.What prompted him to think of that.

“No.That’s my projection for my side incomes from other ventures.”I answered albeit the shock.

He nodded and proceeded to explain to me why my dreams of becoming a well known speaker and trainer,was something that should be set aside for a while.I should be flourishing in the financial industry.I knew he was referring to my statement of intention that I wanna grow my own self development company by next year.He kept harpooning onto me,on the contradicting nature of me speaking so well,yet not being able to succeed financially well.He was talking about image and the needed credibility.He was saying that people are influenced by success and will want to emulate people who were successful,with a home and a car.He was saying that I may not be walking the talk.As he kept speaking his mind,I kept reflecting back on what was it that I needed.A legacy or a bank full of money.

Without a doubt,money is a vital cog in life.With it life becomes so much easier and practical.Yet,I no longer crave for it like a heroin addict.If I was money hungry,I would have resorted to a million obnoxious,non ethical ways to succeed.I’ve done it once and I know I can.But these days,I have a conscious mind that does not beep money.I highlighted to my manager how sickened I was by the constant innuendos I receive from colleagues and him alike,about how I should be flourishing,just because I can speak well.I told him that my speaking ability is a different context altogether.I could not relate clearly to the association.He said that I need to be well liked and reputable to attract.I need to have a car,to show that my success can breed success.Which I do not agree by.I will rather have people sticking by me,for the sheer reasons of my good principles,and not by the four wheels I drive.In a nutshell,there were many aspects of his views,by which I did not agree with.It makes secular sense if someone wants to be a Malay guy who has loads of cash,a car,a house and a reputation to boot along.Me?I prefer the simple things.

Scriptures For The Learned

It’s been a blessed past few days.Full of learning insights.I’ve been sleeping late,as I stared at my 8.9 inch screen watching Dr Zakir Naik provide me with his eloquent proofs of the Quran.It’s funny.I’ve never quite realized just how inadequate my knowledge had been.I regretted not studying hard enough in secondary school.To think that all the subjects taught had a grounded Islamic basis behind them.We’ve been brainwashed in a way to somehow think that Man came from apes.We were told of Darwin’s theory.That ridiculous theory.The funny side to it was that we had to learn this in secondary and even primary school when we were asked to do projects about dinosaurs.

Thinking about it,I was asking myself about the validity of what we had learned all this while.If we were to accept that dinosaurs existed,it means that we are also accepting Darwin’s theory of Evolution right?Simply because we know academically,that the first few cavemen came into prominence a few thousand years after the extinction of dinosaurs.Which sounds ridiculous,when I think about it.Accepting the notions of dinosaurs and cavemen means that I am accepting Darwin’s theory,which is a total conflict with the faith of Muslims and even Christians,of Adam and Eve.Yet,we are still being told that such things exist.Darwin’s radical theory that the world flourishes on that concept of “survival of the strongest”,is also ridiculous,coming to think of it.Cause it just made the existence of planktons redundant.

Another thing popped up in my extensive readings about the authenticity of the Quran.I mean,this sharing is just for the general reading of my beloved readers.Just thought that we,intelligent people,ought to know.Let me pose a hypothetical question.Is it possible for anyone,to humanely describe in vivid details,the events that happened 3000 years before his existence,and then relate that events to the future,which is 1400 years after his demise?Ridiculous you say.Well,unless,you are inspired by the divine Creator himself.Prophet Muhammad pbuh,had that distinction.

Fear What You See

I truly do not know if my last entry had served to put that thought into the reader,that Michael Crichton’s Jurassic Park was all made up.Was sitting down today,and just thinking if I had any reasons to believe that dinosaurs did not exist.Or did they?But certain things came to mind to just raise my doubts.

1.Islam never discussed about their existence.Neither were they mentioned in verses or hadeeths.At least to my knowledge that is.

2.How come dinosaur fossils are always found in deserts,barren areas or somewhere we rarely heard of?Why not in Hollywood?Why not in Mecca?Okay,there is that theory of Earth having only one gigantic tectonic plate,before it broke up.Still,it does not serve to explain why the fossils are found in all areas,that we least expect.

3.If Adam was sent to Earth to act as a Khalifah,to manage the affairs of Earth,then dinosaurs cannot come before Man,right?Management of Earth entails plants and animals.

Just wondering.Enlighten me,if anyone could.

I’ve been brought up to believe a lot of things which I never questioned till now.Things like,

1.UFOs always seem to appear over America.

2.Aliens never liked to abduct Malays.(They sure know we are not that intelligent enough to be dissected upon)

3.Aliens had visited us in the past,and they were the superior race,teaching Mankind absolutely nothing.

4.If contacts were to be made,they will approach the US president.

…and etc.

Crying Out For A Leader

Who'll help him?

I’m still crossing my fingers.Waiting.Malaysia’s Prime Minister,has already issued out an official statement criticizing the Israeli’s attacks on the borders of Gaza.I’m still waiting.And waiting.It’s already past the first day of Muharram,and yet not a single televised account of a MUIS official,or Malay Muslim leader,saying something.A comment perhaps?None.

Indonesians had already sent their First Aid teams to Palestine.Their streets have been thronged with protests.Malaysian blogs have already been filled with comments.I’m still waiting,for an example from our community leaders to say something about the way their brothers and sisters in faith are being slaughtered.Or wait.That’s international and foreign affairs by which we have no jurisdictions to comment on.Is it?

Sigh.

Spare change anyone?

I’ve got some serious mental tuning I need to do.The creaking knee has consumed a considerable amount of storage percentage in my brain.Earlier in the afternoon,I had visited the physiotherapy center in front of my office,to just have a survey.To my dismay,the charges were exorbitant.Fifty bucks for an hour of knee tuning.Sigh.To complicate the evening,I found out to my horror that I had forgotten the knee guards,needed to hold that part of the limb,for my evening soccer session.I was proven right.My thoughts bested me.I struggled during the game,because I kept visualizing a busted knee.Darn.The powers of positive focus eluded me today.Truth be told,I knew that I probably did not need the support of a guard that much.But the psychological leverage it secured me was just too huge to give it a miss.The knee guard has become my losers limb.For now at least.That is till I see Ruud Van Nistelrooy’s knee surgeon.

What happens in Bintan,Stays in Bintan…

There are some things in life that can never be explained.Amongst those things,are the inexplicable nature of me having a stomachache as soon as I board the ferry and then suffering from the worst bout of seasickness ever.So,God hath humbled my darn egoistical perspective that I will never be seasick.In fact,I had brought along a thick book to read.Needless to say,the only book I should have brought along on that trip,should be entitled,”The Idiot’s Guide to Surviving Ferry Rides”.It still brings a smile to my face when I recall,just how someone was banging his fist onto the bathroom door,in which I was in.He banged and banged and all I did was to bang back in return.He must have crapped his waste in his pants.I learned a lesson.Never drink coffee on a morning ferry ride.

Consistent Contrarian

And so.Obama has been sworn in as the 44th President of the great nation,that is the United States of America,whom by chance had asked Hamas to stop attacking Israel.A statement by Condoleeza Rice urging the Hamas regime to stop the violence against Israel.whom by chance had only 13 people reportedly killed,whilst the Palestinian people had only about a few thousands killed and a few thousand others wounded and dying,as medical help is slowly inching its way into the area.Great nations like Israel have weird ways of dealing with “violence”.They either defend by releasing jet fighters against ground troops.Or they defend by spraying sulfur,as reported in the news.Either ways,they are defending themselves.And so they say.

I hope that Obama’s newly installed cabinet will do something.Then again,if you were to follow that contrary ideology of a conspiracy theorist,like myself,you’ll probably say that the Obama cabinet is just just another front line for the “behind the scenes” government,made up of a super league of extraordinary international bankers. Yupz,you heard me. It’s bankers.The same group of people who are reportedly,behind the catastrophic fall of the economic markets.Thus,if you follow the logic of that theorist,you know that the establishment of any state leadership in America,is just to facilitate the continuity of a grand old plan of creating a New World Order,that has once been admitted by Senior Bush to the council of United Nations.So,what does that make out for the typical Malay in you and me?

Mad Man Mad About Maidens

I just saw an MTV video of Neyo’s song,”Mad”,from his,”The Year Of The Gentleman”.It was an intriguing storyline.It began with a quarrel between himself and his partner,which ended with him walking out of the house.As he was getting down the stairs,a young boy chased a ball across the road.Expectedly,Neyo rushed over and the scene was cut.It continued with Neyo,looking over a covered body,bathed in blood.Then the scenes showed how Neyo was looking over his partner and so forth.Apparently,at the end of it all,it was clear that Neyo had passed on.Moral of the story is,

Never get mad for nothing,and then never being able to make up for it.

Crying For My Elevator Smile

I used to enjoy elevator rides.That surprise of being greeted at the 4th floor (i think) by a smile.Then that blank moment of inertia,as the elevator goes two floors up.Then as that smile exits the elevator,my heart cries out so loudly,to the oblivious ears of those around me.And I’ll carry that dazed,mortified facial expression back to my desk.And the welcoming colleagues knew,at that instant that I had once again been in touch with an angel at the elevator.

The Son,The Father and The Whatever

Aaaaah.The beauty of not being inspired for a week.The wondrous pleasure of realizing that being inspired these days,no longer takes the form of cleavage displaying ladies walking around in barely there outfits.The rapturous satisfaction of knowing that my dream car could possibly not be RX 8 anymore,but perhaps a CR 7.And yes,it does not mean Cristiano Ronaldo. It just means that. CR 7.

I enjoyed the weekend,because I discovered a facet of my demonic self.Played a friendly soccer game with my weekly social outfit,Stamford FC.We duly lost that game 5 – 3.But I enjoyed the loss.Because I expressed myself.And by that,I mean,I screamed,shouted and swore.After the game,I reflected quietly to myself,as to why I had a Jekyll and Hyde kinda performances with my two social teams,Redbacks and Stamford.It dawned on me,on that familiar camaraderie with Stamford.The fact that the players I had screamed at,came up to me and said,

Who The Hell Is This Consultant?

It’s been quite a while since I last had a confrontation of any sort.And it’s been quite a while since I had the pleasure of noting,how someone can view me as a threat/annoyance/prick.I had that humble privilege last few nights.At Masjid Abdul Razak.But before that,let me share a short preview.

The Moon Living Its Life

Live Your Life : TI and Rihanna

I was never a fan of Rap music.But this song caught my attention when I viewed it recently on MTV.Well,Rihanna being part of the setup was one thing though.What captivated me was the theme.You know how the Rap genre had the connotations of sex,violence and drugs.Or about how living in the hood was all about.Funnily enough,this song had all of that and more.I read through the lyrics and found that it had the genius of a poet trapped in a gangster’s physicality.TI,(the singer),apparently had lived through the life of a rapper growing in the hood.And the theme of the song is all about him stepping out of that “road”.He wants to pursue a better life.He spoke of how the “industry” is now diluted with people who are just lost in moral priorities.People who are rich but poor in happiness and satisfactions.He spoke about people bringing a sort of false expectations to the “industry”,with nonsensical comparisons such as cars,wealth and others.

Possible Impossibility

I grew intellectually today. By an inch I guess. Because I learned something profound. Well at least in my context that is. Here’s the trivia. What is the difference between a Muslim Malay professional and a professional Malay Muslim? I know what you are thinking, because I had that same aghast quizzical look on my face too. What kinda question was it? It was posed by Clive, Director at Vector Score Card, managing consultant for EDC.

Next Stop.Labor Ward.

There is something worse than knowing that your baby is due at a certain date.It is worse when you realize that time seems to inch its way so ever slowly,towards that blessed day.Going for the last checkup last two days was kinda enlightening.We were supposed to check on the baby’s heartbeat.The device amplified each beat with the frequency of a drum beater,where you’ll hear the highs and the lows.At a range from 132 to 175,I seriously wondered just what a baby can do inside that bag of water he’s in.

Let Your Diapers Do The Soaking

People say that having a baby in your home will be hard.Well,they are wrong.Having a baby in your home is VERY hard.I’m not complaining.I’m just saying that,not understanding why a baby cries make all my years of learning communication skills,pointless.But that’s besides the point.The point is,I’ve also discovered that a baby instinctively does not try to suck on my nipples when I carry them.Fikri is smart.The dad apparently is not.

The Week’s A Beach!

What does Jose Mourinho and me have in common?Aplenty.Good looks,obnoxious charisma and that tinge of arrogance.The only difference could be in that small category of success.Where he had virtually won everything there is in life,I’m still trying to find my niche.The fact is,he probably comes home to his wife,and his wife is probably wondering why people are all hyping about her husband.In her mind,she probably asks,”What is so special about this chap,that women all over the world swoon over w hite haired 40 plus year old man?”I believe the wife also asks the same thing,when it comes to me.Only the people who swoon over me,has the answers,cause even I feel that the thought of being admired is delusional.

Confessions Of A Weddingholic

There are somethings in life that is just inexplicable.Things such as Manchester United losing to Liverpool with a scoreline of 4-1.I will take the glory off the gloss,by stating that Liverpool did not in any way WIN the game.It was Man United that LOST it.Liverpool was bad,as was Man United who was worse.It’s difficult to fathom the frustrations.I’ve grown up to believe that a Man can only cry on two occassions.Once,when he loses his virginity.And second,when his favourite team loses to its arch rivals.The way Fergie’s face was flushed,I could tell that somebody was gonna get hurt,and it definitely was not gonna be a Kop player.

Hello HALO!!!

Some songs just seem to illuminate your inner being.The flavor song for me this month has been Ahmir’s cover of Beyonce’s Halo.Ahmir throws me back to the ages of Boyz 2 Men and their Motownphilly genre of smooth RnB songs.You know,the kinda that soothes your mind,clears your thoughts and just makes you feel as though you are in another planet altogether,standing beside Dr Manhattan.

The month of March has been relatively slow for me in sales.Not because I was not meeting people.I was.But the sales just seemed to be halted at one stage or another.Well,they say that wealth is best derived from the grace of Allah,and not to be acquired with unnecessary urgency.Hopefully,it’ll be good.

Relics For Clerics

I opened the newspaper today and read an article on the upcoming Maulidur Rasul celebrations/event that will be organized at the National Stadium.It was the same event that caught my attention yesterday,as there was a small advert given to me.It will showcase the collaboration of a local mosque and an organization spearheaded by a local Ustadz.I have mixed feelings when I read through the itinerary of the program on the aforementioned date.There will be a selawat recitation session by ex Singapore national footballers.And they’ve been practicing for this event.There will also be a mini honorary procession of some sort for local and Indonesian clerics,who had been invited for this special event.The news report mentioned that there could be around 30 Indonesian clerics that had been specially invited to grace the occassion.

What The Mayans Never Told You

I do not know if you are aware of this theory that the world will end on 21st December 2012!Well,it’s not exactly something new,as it has been the subject of books,findings and researches over the years.In fact,if you were to just Goggle,”What happens in 2012″,you will see scores of discussions in place.I was aware of this late last year when I chanced upon this book on Mayan cultures.As most of you are probably aware of,I am an avide fan of history.Ancient histories that is.Well,the theory goes about to expound on that detail of Mayan calendars.Mayans were an intelligent bunch of people.Discounting the theory that they had the aid of alien intelligence,it did seemed that they were in possession of modern yet arcane knowledge.In fact,I was even more astounded when I watched a documentary on cable last month.In that short documentary,historians actually discovered that the Mayans who had built their temples a.k.a pyramids,had made it such that at a certain point of the day,it will seemed to appear that a giant sanke was scaling up its stairs.Amazing!I watched in amazement as they attempted to replicate the whole event by building a midsize model of the temple,with exact ratios.They then used a torchlight,aligned at the determined angle,at which the sun is supposed to shine on the stairs of the temple.Lo and behold,that as the torchlight(mock sunlight),made its way from east to west,there was indeed a shadow of a serpent making its way up the stairs of the stairs.Subbhanallah!

Therapy For The Recessions

When was the last time you cried?Why did you cry?What did you cry over?

I’ve been fascinated by the therapeutic powers of crying.Somehow,the Creator has installed within our bodily functions,the faculty of therapy and inner healing.Why am I talking about crying?Obviously because,my baby cries.As I hold him,every single day,I’m amazed by the fact that Allah hath made crying,the first mode of understood communication.Babies cry,and we adults interpret those cries as a host of things.Discomfort,nappy changing time,hunger,itch,calling for attention and other important things to a baby.As they grow older,such cries are substituted by words.Funny though that even words,still get misinterpreted.

I heard somewhere the other day,that our Father,Adam,when he was banished to Earth had bowed his head and knelt,crying asking for forgiveness from his Lord for 200 years.He was ashamed of his sin.I am ashamed of myself.I cannot even “sujud” for 10 minutes.And I’ve committed more sin,that’s for sure.

When was the last time I cried whilst praying?

Anyway,if you have not listened to Qari Ziyad Patel recite the Quran,I implore and suggest that you do so.Wait let me rephrase that.You must.It will be a blasphemous shame,if you die without listening to the beauty of the Holy Scriptures,recited by this blessed man.It’s so beautiful.The kind of beta melody that will put you into that alter consciousness.Imagine just sitting alone,in the vast plains of the sandy desert,without anything else but your MP3 with the recitations being played.

Just a sample of how you can get the winners of 8 seasons of American Idols,have them sing the best composed song on Earth,and still they will lose to the sheer relaxation factor,the voice above had given through the holy verses.

I hope this short entry,will get you moving to download the MP3s of the above reciter.Believe me,it’s one of the cheapest self healing method you can ever employ on yourselves.Relaxation guaranteed.

The Appreciative Man Of Zanylon

Sometimes it’s a blessing to touch base with the notion that your life is perhaps so much better.I think you can identify with me on this.On the fact that a sense of appreciation is actually a sense of feeling coming from within.Yes,truth is sometimes we do need that tinge of appreciation from those around us.Friends,colleagues,loved ones and so forth.But what happens,when those gratifications from an external source is no longer granted,or have perhaps never been given at all?

Can You Book That Book For Me?

Yesterday evening was quite a day.And by that I mean,that I discovered a facet of myself.Was scheduled to have an appointment over at Funan at 1830.I reached City Hall at 1700,right after my session of public speaking coaching with the girls at CHIJ.Several things came to mind as to how I could spend that one and a half hour,but I decided to prioritize.Off I went to have my late lunch at Long John Silver,over at Capitol building.Settled for Golden Deal with two chickens,with coleslaw added.As time passes,I am inclined to believe that either my eyes are failing me,or the chicken that they serve these days are getting smaller.Anyway,it is in my personal opinion,that the coleslaw offered at LJS,happens to be the best in those served at fast food joints.Second best is Tenderbest’s.I plonked myself in one of the seats so that I could face the windows,and watch the world pass me by as I ate.Scores of minahs and mats walked past.Most of the minahs,were eye candy.Visual feast,because it seemed like that they wanted their family jewels to pop out of their tight clothings.Ample cleavages showcased by girls barely old enough,to buy cigarettes.I was pertubed,because I never had those kind of girls whilst I was in secondary.Finished my meal in a record time of 25 minutes,and headed straight out to the building next to Capitol.

Father of all Motherly Theories

Standing in the line awaiting for the shuttle bus,Hijazi,put down his bag on the floor.He flipped through the pages of his recently bought book.Suddenly the silence of the air was shattered by the shrill of a voice behind him,

“Where is this place ah?”

Hijazi turned his head,and saw a bespectacled woman,with a mobile phone in her hand,screaming,

“Where is this place ah?”

Two Steps.One on the Ego,the other One Forward.

I’ve kept away from you,for quite a while have I not?So,did you miss me?Well,I did.But being bereft of inspiration can be a bane.Especially on someone like me.A Bruce Wayne underneath that cloak of a financial planner.Life is ironically boring when so many exciting things are happening.Like how my beloved Redbacks has to go through that upheaval of getting new players.It’s not so much about the movement of players,especially in this era of transfer dealings being ridiculously expounded.In  my social context however,it’s more of players moving to play in other teams.No qualms about it,because I am an advocate of human rights.Free to play,free to go.But it’s the manner at which some individuals hasten their departures,that leaves a bitter taste in my mouth,which have me nodding in agreement with my theory that our next generation have a lot to make up.Apart from one,it was disappointing that a major part of the leaving players lacked the balls to perhaps,just bid a word of farewell.I mean,it’s as good as entering someone’s house,dining and shitting there,and having the audacity to just walk out the gates.Of course,my theory of free to play,free to go applies.What am saying is that,a usual,unassuming human being usually has that thing called decency of manners.It’s a rhetorical statement if we pinpoint such things to parenting or education,cause I never liked to blame both.Cause as Arsene Wenger and Fergie said,”If you are good enough,you are old enough.”Which in their case,might be neither.But I don’t blame such individuals.Being tenacious and zealous young men,it just means that they need to express their talents and egos on a platform where they are not stifled or confined to the rigid standings of middle aged men.It just means that they see,their man management and creative streaks are best exploited at a level,where they can pat themselves in the back everytime on a job well done,without having the figments of advices of middle aged men who do not know what they are talking about,after playing football for the number of years these young men have lived.It’s regrettable,that somehow,the analogy of blowing bubble is apt for this context.For these young men,are blowing a bubble big enough for them to encapsulate themselves in.

Tweet The Teats

I’m sure you’ve heard of that new song piece from Justin Timberlake. The one where he sang with Ciara, entitled, “Love Sex Magic”.3 intriguing words lined up in one title. What a great way to just mess that horny,adrenalin rush in each and one of us.I was just trying to reason out as to why the order of the words were placed in such a manner.Why not magic first,followed by sex and then love? That’s what a typical Playboy host will do.(ehem).Create the magic,and then in the mentioned order.But I guess,the producers for the song was spot on.People fall in love,then they do that thing they do and say it’s magic.I think.

I was on my way home,from office just now.Stopped at Lucky Plaza bust stop.As I was making my way to the subground tunnel to the MRT station, a client called.As I was engrossed answering her queries,I noticed a lady with biceps and big boobs coming down the stairs of Lucky Plaza.And when I say big,it’s big as in perhaps a 38 or something.I choked on my saliva,when I saw her.Why?Because,firstly,she was clearly a “he”.A tranny.It was wearing a low cut neck blouse that had its ample bosoms just wanting to spill over.And no,I had no reasons to get excited because,it’s nipples were just super erected,that it sure made Madonna’s cone shaped brasierre a farce.It was fake ugly as a sight.I literally stopped in my tracks just to recollect my fleeting sanity.The client at the other end was calling out for my attention,but I was just dumb speechless.It’s horrendous.There was no lov,sex or even magic with that “lady”.

Do You Know Me Well Enuff?

Facebook has this wacky application where one is able to create a series of questions,designed to find out if people around you truly knows you.It’s that application called”How well do you know?”.It’s wacky only for the sheer fact,that it can set temperatures rising.As typified by my missus the other day,when I posted my very own version of it.It was amusing noting just how berserk she went,when she discovered that she scored somewhere in the 50% region.*lol*.She claimed that the answers that I had designed for the posted questions were “fake”.Meaning that I probably did not mean it.I got the same response from my sister who excitedly claim that I had manipulated my answers,as it was not reflective of who I was.

Respectfully Preaching

Let me just get some random thoughts of my head,whilst the lingering stench is still there.

1.Was having a makan session with Kai the other day,and he casually mentioned about a preacher he had heard earlier after his dawn prayers that Sunday.Kai used the term,”fundamentalist” in his casual description of this particular preacher.Was interested to know what could have drove this bro of mine to say such things.Apparently,this preacher had implied explicitly that the pursuit of all things material,ie,wealth and riches was something that should not be propagated.I understand from where Kai was coming from,on this issue,as it was akin to insinuating that collecting riches was perhaps sinful,if in accordance to this preacher’s warped view.

Legends Of Islam (Part 1)

I’ve been thinking.

For over a month now,I’ve not been the least inspired to type in an entry.I’ve did actually.Typed two full paragraphs and I’ll press the “delete” button.That was how demoralized I was.Did not have the will to type my thoughts.

If you happen to be free,and not knowing what to do,can I kindly suggest to you a website?Seriously,all praises to Allah,for helping me stumble onto this gem of a site.

http://www.hoor-al-ayn.com/

Why is this website a gem?

As I am typing in this entry,my ears are plugged into an audio I had downloaded earlier in the day.The MP3 audio entitled Salahuddin Al Ayubbi.It’s a beautiful piece of audio.Two days ago,I had downloaded a piece speaking on the same historical figure.The MP3 was entitled Legends of Islam,Salahuddin Al Ayubbi.It was an hour lecture that was impactful in the way a man’s biography was told.I hate to admit this for fear of over dramatization,but I have to highlight this poignant piece of info.I choked and held back my tears whilst I was in the train to soccer,listening to the lecture.Hard for me to explain,but there was a series of narration in that lecture that made my head and heart swirl with a multitude of unexplained emotions.There was this intense feeling of embarrasment,shame and fear at the state of life I am living.Before I go on further,I have to just highlight a statement made by my brother in law that made the deepest sense.

“People give birth to children,and are already planning for their future,(eg education,wealth,status,marriage,social standings etc.)How many are actually planning a guaranteed place for their children in Jannah?How many parents have thought about it?”

It stucked me hard because,I am guilty as charged.Overly concerned with how my son,will cope with intellectual developments.Physical developments.Speech developments.All sorts of developments,except that of those that can ensure him a guided path.Shame on me,the father.

Anyway,back to the great warrior general,Salahuddin ra.As I heard the narration,I was mesmerized by his charisma,personality,wisdom,bravery and most of all his leadership.I strongly suggest that if you,the reader,is a man who aspires for a role model in life.A hero.Download the MP3.Insya Allah that hour long lecture will shed and illuminate a zeal and drive to be purposeful.

In a previous audio lecture I heard,there was a narration in which it was told of what really motivated Salahuddin to liberate the Holy Land of Jerusalem.It was a vivid poetic narration of how Salahuddin entered the city and read out a letter that he had received from a woman in the city.If I am not wrong,the lady had described herself as a mosque that had been molested by the hands of crusaders and she had called out to Salahuddin,the “destroyer of crucifixes and crosses” to help her.That plea of help,drove Salahuddin to claim back the lands of Jerusalem.It was a beautiful way to describe a majestic entrance.Just inexplicably beautiful.

There were narrations after narrations of his leadership and his charisma.His sworn enemies attested to how just he was as a leader.In fact,there were accounts that upon his death,the Jews within Jerusalem had sent out letters to their bretherens in other parts of the world,grieving the demise,of the best leader any nation could ever have.How many Muslim leaders today can claim to such honour?

I have a lot to write about this grand man.In fact,I will want to dedicate a research into the fundamentals of leadership from the biography of Salahuddin Al Ayubbi.And I will not stop there I guess.There’s Khalid Ibn Walid,Umar Al Khattab and so many others.And the best of all,the Prophet p.b.u.h.

Funny how,I’ve been looking for role models outside the context of Islam for so long,when there is a mine awaiting in the historical annals of Islam.

May Allah guide me on this fantastic journey of discovery…

…and please brothers and sisters,visit the website http://www.hoor-al-ayn.com/. There is a whole host of resources for every need and learning you want. Seriously.I’ve just erased 1GB of songs in my MP3 to put in all the lectures.And spread the info around to your loved ones.The message I share here,if replicated and practiced,even I will get the good deeds,insya Allah.salam!

ps:for therapeutic sessions at night when you need to be close to yourself and your Lord,perhaps you may wanna download the nasyeeds.Especially the ones from Palestine…

Black or White Branding

In a not so distant past, a scrawny bespectacled guy stood and exclaimed, “Hi,my name’s Michael Jackson.” The corny introduction exploded the classroom into a episode of mocking giggling! That scrawny guy was me, on my first day in Secondary One.

Fast forward, and here I am scrolling down the pages of tributes laid for the legend that he was. Mr Michael Jackson, or perhaps as rumoured, Mikael, a name he took upon embracing Islam.And so we were told.His unexpected demise was made known to me,as early as the break of dawn when I was bottle feeding the baby.As surreal as it was,seeing the bold headline flashed across Channel News Asia, it was even weird to feel gratified. Gratified perhaps by that small fact that I am a generation,lucky enough to witness his crotch grabbing antics on real time.Not through the yesteryear memories embodied in YouTube vids.That will be for my son.As the days pass,and as more news and snippets of his life filters through,I feel sadden.

Perhaps sadden is too general a term to use.I’m not a myopic fan,who’ll probably conspire to claim that he’s still dancing with Elvis.I’m just another human being,who have been subtly impacted by the branding legacy of his music.As footages of young Michael screeching on the stage with his entourage of Jackson 5 played itself,I cannot help but wonder aloud…”What happened?”

No doubt,as days,weeks,months and years pass,we will probably be engulfed with bits and pieces of his life story.He was a child abuser,a homosexual,a bulemic,a misfit, a depressed and forlorn figure and a gazillion other adjectives describing a flawed hero.How did a musically inclined prodigy self destruct on the paths of depression and aggression?Did the fame and scrutiny proved to be a disastrous cocktail of events,that drove him onto the brinks of insanity?Or was he destined to forever be enshrouded in that legacy of erratic behaviours and clueless antics.Poor Michael.Michael the entertainer was an immaculate example of just what artiste this days are severely lacking.Raw passionate showmanship.The one handed white glove.The smooth almost floating Moonwalk.The declining almost impossible 45 degrees decline.And that memorable crotch grabbing motion that leaves both men and women delirious.

Which brings me to the point of this entry.Just what did I learn and can learn from this mountain of a man?

• Branding

There is and can only be one Michael Jackson.He may be debt ridden in the region of half a billion,but analysis has indicated that his music legacy will surpass the billion mark profits.Just like Bruce Lee,John Lennon,Kurt Cobain and so many others,the legacy left will provide sustenance for their family’s upbringing.But how did Michael elevate himself,as the black man that defined the entertainment industry in a white man’s country?

Simple.He packaged himself as the complete brand.A brand that renews,reinvents and redefined the face of music/entertainment industry every now and then.

And for that alone,he is worthy of the legend tag he is entitled to…

RIP MJ.