Two Steps.One on the Ego,the other One Forward.

I’ve kept away from you,for quite a while have I not?So,did you miss me?Well,I did.But being bereft of inspiration can be a bane.Especially on someone like me.A Bruce Wayne underneath that cloak of a financial planner.Life is ironically boring when so many exciting things are happening.Like how my beloved Redbacks has to go through that upheaval of getting new players.It’s not so much about the movement of players,especially in this era of transfer dealings being ridiculously expounded.In  my social context however,it’s more of players moving to play in other teams.No qualms about it,because I am an advocate of human rights.Free to play,free to go.But it’s the manner at which some individuals hasten their departures,that leaves a bitter taste in my mouth,which have me nodding in agreement with my theory that our next generation have a lot to make up.Apart from one,it was disappointing that a major part of the leaving players lacked the balls to perhaps,just bid a word of farewell.I mean,it’s as good as entering someone’s house,dining and shitting there,and having the audacity to just walk out the gates.Of course,my theory of free to play,free to go applies.What am saying is that,a usual,unassuming human being usually has that thing called decency of manners.It’s a rhetorical statement if we pinpoint such things to parenting or education,cause I never liked to blame both.Cause as Arsene Wenger and Fergie said,”If you are good enough,you are old enough.”Which in their case,might be neither.But I don’t blame such individuals.Being tenacious and zealous young men,it just means that they need to express their talents and egos on a platform where they are not stifled or confined to the rigid standings of middle aged men.It just means that they see,their man management and creative streaks are best exploited at a level,where they can pat themselves in the back everytime on a job well done,without having the figments of advices of middle aged men who do not know what they are talking about,after playing football for the number of years these young men have lived.It’s regrettable,that somehow,the analogy of blowing bubble is apt for this context.For these young men,are blowing a bubble big enough for them to encapsulate themselves in.

In football context,I usually reserve 4 or 5 lettered expletives for such players.Only because,it’s justified in footballing context.But on a more humane level,where friendships have been forged and implied upon,I usually say that it’s just an oversight for them.In the world of leadership as coined by John C Maxwell,we say that it’s just a matter of social integrity.In which case,is lacking.In men to men’s context,it’s just about having the balls.That ability to perhaps just withdraw from a team with a tad of friendly courtesy.But maybe I’m just asking too much.I mean,we live and we learn.We all know that the world is such.We should never confuse blame and self responsibility.Blame is what we do to ourselves when the whole world just does not seems right.Self responsibility is how we conduct ourselves to the whole world when we are not right.But,there’s no need to rush.We move forward,one step at a time.

The whole world does not stop rotating just because someone decided to walk backwards.

Anyway,on a lighter side of things,the baby is now officially over the two months threshold.He’s a grand 5kg.Heh.The wife’s been having a bit of ache everywhere carrying him.Me?I’m still the official BathMaster and MilkMaker.I’ve thoroughly enjoyed my weekends these days.Bringing the ‘lil one all over the island on modes of public transportations.Having strangers coo at him.Calling him cute,naughty,smart and other adjectives which would have sounded perfect on me too.Chinese and Causasians seem to have a ceratin affection for his wide eyes.The way he just laughs out aloud.He chuckles like as if he’s watching,”Whose Line Is It Anyway?”.He whines and cries like a typical Junior Redbackers.Without the tears.Just loud empty wailing.But,it’s laughable.He’s entitled to it cause he’s a baby,I figured.

Looking at him sometimes,leaves me in that adrenalin rush of hope and anticipation.Unknowingly to this small guy,he has two set of relatives to tap on,as the basis of family network.But,currently he only has one to tap on.Am not sure as of now,if it’s something bad,but I leave such affairs to the Lord above.That adrenalin of wanting to make sure my wife and boy is well provided in my absence,is overwhelming.If in any matter my absence precedes,I have to make sure that they are financially secured enough to not even consider the assistance of relatives.Hopefully,as time gathers,he’ll be acquainted with all his family members.It’s not a must,but it’s just a sense of social integrity I wish to instill in him.

Am gonna conduct my 2nd module of my financial seminar this coming 24th.I’ll be touching on Cashflow Management.Do let me know if anyone of you is interested in attending.

The more I am in the career,the more I’m convinced how misconstrued people’s perceptions are about finance,planning,wealth and everything else related to it.Some are just plain ignorant to the core.It’s a waste of time to even start discussing anything tangible or not.These are the group of people that will have their family members quarelling at courts to claim $200.I’m slowly moving away from such attachments.Anyway,the workshop is just to touch base with such issues.And this time around I’m seriously not interested in sugar coating my words to have it generally accepted by the masses.It does not do them a world of good.I know just how well paid,preachers and speakers who speaks the lingo of the masses.That’s why,the community is stuck in that doldrums of contentment and happiness and peace and serenity.That’s where the blessings for all concept will come about.I can no longer be the self hypocritical speaker,who speaks on the basis of goodwill,but to the detriments of the masses and my clients.Doctors have to give the bitter medicine.

Oh well,we’ll see how it goes.Make a date with me on the 24th.It’ll be from 10 to 1.

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4 thoughts on “Two Steps.One on the Ego,the other One Forward.

  1. hey friend,

    firstly, i am glad that i did informed u guys about leaving the team. So, whoever u were talking about, only you and some of your close friends know about it. If you want to talk about having the balls to do something, maybe you should ask yourself that question first. I am sorry you feel bitter about it, really. But maybe for once, question why does people leave the team. If i ever had anyone leaving my team, i would find out what is the root of the problem. If i am the problem, that i should take responsibility for my actions. Again, this is just my opinion and everyone is entitled to theirs.

    I was honestly angry that after playing football with you guys for more than a year, some of you just cant take the most honest of feedbacks. What really saddens me in the end was how much guys kept talking about older players coming back to the team and how unimportant the rest of me and my guys was. Do you seriously think that all i(or the rest of us) care about is goals and statistics? If you and some others do, then seriously, you guys dont deserve what we have faithfully contributed to Redbacks. After being angry and sad, after much thought, i became motivated to build a team of our very own which was something i want to do for a long long time.

    We came to join the Redbacks family thinking that we will be treated like one. However, our passion for football and for the team was thought to be otherwise. Nobody had the guts or was gentleman enough to find out more rather than making judgements. Til now, i still feel slightly upset, but still i hope nothing but only the best for Redbacks.

    Dont take this personal ok. Of all of the guys, i am sure you know what i am talking about. And at least you are man enough to express your bitterness in the web.

    What else do you expect bro? I have thanked you guys and informed in advance on a Tuesday. It’s not because of Redbacks that we left, it’s the people behind Redbacks. Get it?

  2. No offence taken babe.Don’t worry.Nothing personal as we are all entitled to our principles in life.I do not speak for the team,and neither am I a representative of any sorts.I know the gripes you may have about the dynamics and lack of appreciation of any sorts.I believe however that pehaps the extension of appreciation Redbacks can offer to you,will not quench your hunger and ambitions.If it’s the people at Redbacks that may have instigated a decision on your part,I salute your conviction in moving forward and finally able to gather the gumption to form a team of your own.At the end of the day,am sure you know that,your move will be a move eventually considering the age of the players.Hakz.

    It’s regrettable because,I believe there could have been a better way to absolve anyone of the blaming game.You cannot blame it on how,people have fond chats about old players,because it’s just part and parcel of being nostalgic.Am sure that when you are in your 40s,knees all creaking and not being able to play,younger players in your Jaws team will speak fondly of you.But does that mean that the young crop of players are not appreciated?On the contrary.Part and parcel of team dynamics is accepting certain things as part of growing.And that includes conflicts and disagreements.

    Nevertheless,as I said,I feel bitter not because of you guys leaving,but rather at the manner at which it was done.You have highlighted your departure,but what about the rest?Not even a single whisper?Are they above the morality of etiquette?You’ve been in a supervisory role before brother,so you understand best what it means.Even if you hate your floor manager,it does not mean you cannot say goodbye to your crew.In such instances,it just draws people to make judgement calls.

    People feel bitter because they care.Care enough to be hurt.People like Mat Nawi,your brother and all.Being men,you’ve got to highlight to them that being appreciated is not about having their balls licked or given good words.Being appreciated means,people look out for you.You’ve got your reasons.The rest of them that followed maybe had theirs too.But it does not entitle anyone to be egoistical about it.

    Maybe brother,just to make a simple point.I hated you lot when you guys first came in because I personally thought that you were all about big egos and lacking substance.But eventually,you guys won me over with the commitment and tenacity in games,and I grew to like and respect you lot.That,is me appreciating you lot.And just because I do not say it or make it be known,does not mean I don’t!

    So,to conclude,do not bear any more grudges yah!You are reaching the threshold of marriage and everything,and so there’s more to life than these social outfits.Cross my heart bro,I do hope you will guide those young chaps in your team.I hate egoistical bastards,and I hope your team members will not grow to have inflated egos.They are a good bunch of level headed Mats,and they should inculcate a sense of responsibility and care.It will do them well for their future.

    Kudos once again mate,on forming your team!Go for the win!Take care.

    1. Bro, glad to hear from you and that you have not bear any grudges. I dun blame anyone for me leaving Redbacks, instead i am grateful to Redbacks that spur me to form my own team. Maybe you are right about me leaving eventually, but then again, even if i have my own team, does that mean i wont or cant play for Redbacks? In fact, my games now are sometimes on Saturdays as you guys know. If i really want to play, i will play for Redbacks.

      So allow me to cut the bull story short about why we left the team. I lost respect for the captain for being unable to take other perspective point of view. I do have a winning-mentality and i will stay true to what i am. Redbacks could have been better but according to the captain, Redbacks is best after we guys left. The comments i read at the Redbacks domain was really quite sad. Obviously, some of you guys enjoyed having a crack at those who left and made a joke out of it. You call that being appreciative? I had people telling me about what you guys talked about too in the past but i chose not to believe it.

      You know what touched me most after i left Redbacks, one of you actually told me that i was never a former redback and will always be a redback. And that person is not you, Khai nor Captain Azhar who i had somemuch respect for at a time.

      Wow… keep trying to make this short but ended up so long…Jaz, i always felt both of us could have get along very well. Too bad, it didnt happen. And i totally understand, playing for Redbacks for just a year doesnt make us a real part of it. It’s the friendship that you guys had that is treasured more than anything else.

      Good luck to Redbacks bro…i hope you guys continue to enjoy ur playing days until old age. Oh ya, i asked if one day, we could have a friendly? Everybody obviously ignored me on purpose huh? Haha… funny la you guys, dont like me just be straight forward la. Can talk.

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